Miss Lindsay Lane retires

“There comes a time when you have to choose between turning the page and closing the book”

To my dear followers,
 
I have been pondering long and hard about this decision, even to the extent that it gave me sleepless nights. One day I decided to just continue with this blog, and the other day I was so sure I wanted to pull the plug. I constantly switched between the two, not knowing what was best or what I really wanted.

I have been thinking about letting go of this blog for quite some time now, but to be frank: I never really had the guts to call it quits, because I was afraid that my decisions were made on a whim and that I would come to regret it, or that it was based on the mood episodes I so often have.

The final decision has finally been made and I decided to retire Miss Lindsay Lane. It is a painful decision nonetheless, which might sound weird to those who do not blog themselves. But those who do, know that a blog is something you become very attached to, as it becomes an extension of yourself. You care for it, invest a lot of time and love in it, and you build a beautiful community with like-minded people.

I started this blog in 2009, in a time when blogging was all the rage. Especially vintage blogging.
Always an old soul with a hint of nostalgia to a time I never lived myself, a world of beauty opened for me, seeing all those blogs with gorgeous girls in gorgeous fashions with interests like mine and I wanted to become a part of it. Petticoats and Pin ups was born; the first name for this blog (the second name was Vintage Rose) that is now known as Miss Lindsay Lane. On this blog I eagerly posted my vintage musings, my clothing that I photographed with a point and shoot camera (in shabby lighting, might I add) and all things that inspired me. I felt this blog had a goal and it gave me so much pleasure.

I have had blogs ever since I came in touch with the world wide web, but this one was different. I am a person with a ton of diverse interests, which makes it very hard for me to keep my attention focused on one area. I bounced back and forth between these interests and many of my blogs bit the dust in the process, which were never online for longer than a few months. But not this one. This one stood tall for almost 9(!) years, and I am proud of that.

The vintage community could be a little harsh at times, especially some fora I was on, but not the vintage blogging community. I experienced these ladies, and some gents, as supporting and loving and gave me online friendships I still treasure to this day.

Over the years I saw many of the big vintage blogs retire, especially with the arrival of Instagram. I was sad to see it happen, but it was understandable, especially since nothing is as changeable as the world wide web and if you want to stay on top of your game online, you have to change with it and it can be ruthless. Something I couldn't always keep up with.

It is hard to let go of Miss Lindsay Lane, especially since I practically shared my life here; something that made me feel so very vulnerable and always in conflict with myself if this sharing (oversharing?) was a good thing. In 2011 I was voluntarily hospitalized in a mental hospital for 3 weeks, as I suffered a very painful breakdown. I wrote about it on this blog, with a lot of reluctance and fear for what my followers would think of me. But there was no need for fear... you were all so, so supportive. And when I got out I felt renewed and had the energy for new things and a better life. I did new photoshoots, had a lot of new ideas for this blog, and so forth.

But, little did I knew, my life would collapse again 5 months later when the person I called my soulmate died suddenly. It was a heavy blow I never recovered from to this day, and most likely never will recover from. This was also something I wrote about on this blog and I poured out all my raw emotions, which, when I read them today, still make me cry. And again: my followers were there for me with comforting words. The support I received was HUGE. Something I will never forget.

This blog also gave me the opportunity to collaborate with some lovely vintage clothing and makeup brands I am still thankful for today. I never in my wildest dreams, when I started this blog, thought I would be chosen by brands to represent them, and I even reeled in a few modeling assignments at that. Suffice to say, I was (and am) very proud when it did happen. I still wear most of the clothes I modeled and I wear them with pride.

The past few years I started to experience problems with this blog, as my interests, appearance, and fashion started to shift and didn't fit what my blog initially stood for. My desire to wear vintage only started to wane. I have changed a lot in the recent years and my blog suffered from it. I felt I wanted to write about other things than just vintage. Ultimately I got into conflict with myself about how to continue this blog. I inserted a pause for an indefinite time, hoping that I could sort out what I wanted, secretly hoping that the right answer on what to do would come to me like the vision of Virgin Mary to Sister Bernadette Soubirous. But, it never really came and in the end, this blog started to feel like dragging a dead horse. I have had a hard time deciding what to post and what not, and most of my online activity happened on Instagram anyway.

And so, it was time to cut the umbilical cord of this blog. It is time to say goodbye: I want to thank all of you who stuck with me since the beginning of this blog, and of course the new followers that tagged on along the way. It meant, and still means, a lot to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

If you do want to keep up with me and my life, and my magnitude of interests, you can follow my Instagram, Pinterest, or Twitter. I also write another blog, which is a food blog, where I post my recipes and all things related to my herbalism and where I sometimes talk about life. This blog will not retire, is written in Dutch though, and you can find it here: Thyme and Pepper.

So long, folks!