How I deal with mean and negative peopleJuly 23, 2015
Mean people ... I call them energy vampires and we all know them. People who are constantly sending out negativity in the form of gossip, childish 'mean girl' behaviour, and people who try to suck you down to their level to feel better themselves.
Dealing with mean and negative people can be a huge downer on your day; these people can really drain you. While you might think it can take a while for you to not let it harm you, it is actually possible in a few steps.
People who dress different than the mainstream -like most of my beautiful readers and blogging collegues do- will know what it is to be, at times, the talk of the town and usually be the centre of attention wherever we go.
Fighting against mean people is quite an issue these past years, especially on the internet. Everywhere on the world wide web I read about women (and really, men, too) who have to deal with extremely hurtful and mean anonymous comments on their photos or blog posts. It saddens me how rude and brutal people can be and seeing what it does to their targets. This really needs to stop.
Although I have to admit that I have come across such a comment only once in my 7 years of blogging, I have had to deal with my fair share of mean people on the street. Usually I get more compliments than laughs, but you know how it works, right? You might get a ton of compliments in a day, and one negative comment aswell ... and all that remains in your head is the negative one.
“Ignore the critics… Only mediocrity is safe from ridicule. Dare to be different!” ― Dita von Teese
I show you in this post how I deal with mean people and what my strategies are! Read along ...
• In every mean person hides an insecure human being
As for people spreading negativity about you, know that they might see you as a threat, are jealous of you and feel frustrated and weak. Ofcourse they will deny this.
They might be afraid that other people will find you interesting, perhaps even more interesting than them, and there is really no other explanation, or reason, than this for the gossip they spread about you. By spitting out negative energy to you, and about you, they try to break you down to their level and try to make you less appealing to others. They want to feel better than you, and gossip is the only way for them to do so.
It takes a lot of energy to constantly bad mouth you with hopes others won't find you so appealing, so realize that one day people will become tired of him/her constantly talking (bad) about you, and it will turn against them in the long run. People will ask themselves why on earth the gossiper is talking so much about you.
Protect yourself against these toxic, bad mouthing people by realizing the stated above, and send positive vibes and compassion toward them - even if only in your thoughts. When you realize the reasons for their gossiping behaviour, it will help you stay calm and it will help you to let it slide off more easily. They are simply intimidated by you!
• Kill them with kindness
Being so kind to them, or even think or talk kind about them, will make them uncomfortable and they will not know what to do with it. By fueling their negative attitudes you give them what they want. Avoid that at all cost. You are not like them, you are more mature. Be stronger than them. Do people laugh at you in your face? Give them a friendly smile and continue your business.
Think of them as people struggling with their own identity; they are struggling so much that they want to tear your confidence down. By thinking, and acting, kindly towards them it usually confronts them with their own petty behaviour and it sets you two steps in front of them.
• Do not engage in their negativity
Be the graceful and more mature person. Laugh their negativity off and walk away. Let their negative 'school girl' kind of behaviour for what it is.
There's almost nothing more appalling and unattractive than mature people acting like mean school children.
Pay no attention to them and just be your gorgeous self. Shine!